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Lahore is present located decently to the north-east side of what would be Pakistan’s stomach if you assume it to be one giant dinosaur, apart from the fact that this analogy provides room for the Kashmir as being the throat it quite adequately places this marvellous city quite about the position where heart should be. On second thoughts it may be the gall bladder, in more anatomically precise geography but that is unacceptable and I am not entirely sure dinosaurs had gallbladders anyway so let’s just leave it at that and move on.
Victory or failure is indeed in the hands of fate however it so appears that fate has been quite deliberately a bit naughty with the poor population control authorities as it is quite clear that they have as much of efficiency of say oil has of extinguishing fire. Indeed they have been rumoured to be practically increasing it but for the greater good let’s not get into the more descriptive explanations.
Indeed such expansion can be compared to a balloon filled comically with people of all shapes and sizes, the balloon itself made up of the same stubborn material as which the LDA clerks are made of. It does not burst but continues to puff up whereas by all sensible estimates it ought to have given up a couple of years ago. But they say there is some place known as Karachi and compared to that it still an innocent infant, baby elephant though it may be.
After a lot of stone-throwing, setting-fire-to-random-stuff-ing ,sharing of rather descriptive expletives by the general community to the city’s authorities it has been finally been decided that maybe clean air , some water and half-decent roads are a sort of necessity and people seem to require it possibly because they pay taxes for them specifically. Indeed it has been duly realized and it is to city’s great pride that much work has been done on it. However it so appears that the officials are slightly confused about which bit goes where and hence you obtain nice clean air by opening your household taps, water is in no scarcity at the roads and the road-tar can be extracted quite directly from the air.
The Lahoris have truly been named to be quite brave at heart, the sort of the ones that go up to their rooftops to see their own city getting blitz-ed. Indeed its bravery not foolishness as some people may disagree, because come to think of it such act would be committed by like really really stupid people and any man who knows his way in the world would most earnestly advise you as a passing tourist or traveller to be extremely wary of their cunning. So let’s just draw the line at the fact that that Lahoris love a good show and aren’t particularly bothered by the stage or the performer and it has nothing to do with bravery or intelligence.
Another pretty deep observation nowadays dawning not only upon the Lahoris themselves but the mankind in general is that they always seem to tell the wrong way. Imagine you are a bit lost while finding your great-aunt’s sister-in-law’s second-cousin’s house and ask for the way from an unsuspecting fruit-vendor, he would draw himself up to his full height and with a voice bleeding with confidence and bursting with surety he would point you to exactly and absolutely towards the wrong way. With this as one of their strongest point many philosophers have reflected that Lahoris would make excellent guardians of hell.
It’s quite a shame really and one can smell foreign conspiracies from the fact that nobody ever considered Lahore to be environment friendly. Sure there is quite a lot of littering and water and air may not be exactly as they are supposed to be but the zeal of energy conservation and environment protection runs through the Lahori bloodline. Show me any city around where people stand hours in the scorching sun to get CNG over the more pollutant petrol? Show me some place on world which is content with six hours of electricity and mind you do not dare compare it to some undeveloped African village. It is city, damn it, of a million living souls (and even more not-living ones but adding that would be cheating) and totally unique in heavens and earth (notice how hell isn’t included).
As such there are no mountains or hills around but you can see much a greater burden on some of the city’s less fortunate.
Victory or failure is indeed in the hands of fate however it so appears that fate has been quite deliberately a bit naughty with the poor population control authorities as it is quite clear that they have as much of efficiency of say oil has of extinguishing fire. Indeed they have been rumoured to be practically increasing it but for the greater good let’s not get into the more descriptive explanations.
Indeed such expansion can be compared to a balloon filled comically with people of all shapes and sizes, the balloon itself made up of the same stubborn material as which the LDA clerks are made of. It does not burst but continues to puff up whereas by all sensible estimates it ought to have given up a couple of years ago. But they say there is some place known as Karachi and compared to that it still an innocent infant, baby elephant though it may be.
After a lot of stone-throwing, setting-fire-to-random-stuff-ing ,sharing of rather descriptive expletives by the general community to the city’s authorities it has been finally been decided that maybe clean air , some water and half-decent roads are a sort of necessity and people seem to require it possibly because they pay taxes for them specifically. Indeed it has been duly realized and it is to city’s great pride that much work has been done on it. However it so appears that the officials are slightly confused about which bit goes where and hence you obtain nice clean air by opening your household taps, water is in no scarcity at the roads and the road-tar can be extracted quite directly from the air.
The Lahoris have truly been named to be quite brave at heart, the sort of the ones that go up to their rooftops to see their own city getting blitz-ed. Indeed its bravery not foolishness as some people may disagree, because come to think of it such act would be committed by like really really stupid people and any man who knows his way in the world would most earnestly advise you as a passing tourist or traveller to be extremely wary of their cunning. So let’s just draw the line at the fact that that Lahoris love a good show and aren’t particularly bothered by the stage or the performer and it has nothing to do with bravery or intelligence.
Another pretty deep observation nowadays dawning not only upon the Lahoris themselves but the mankind in general is that they always seem to tell the wrong way. Imagine you are a bit lost while finding your great-aunt’s sister-in-law’s second-cousin’s house and ask for the way from an unsuspecting fruit-vendor, he would draw himself up to his full height and with a voice bleeding with confidence and bursting with surety he would point you to exactly and absolutely towards the wrong way. With this as one of their strongest point many philosophers have reflected that Lahoris would make excellent guardians of hell.
It’s quite a shame really and one can smell foreign conspiracies from the fact that nobody ever considered Lahore to be environment friendly. Sure there is quite a lot of littering and water and air may not be exactly as they are supposed to be but the zeal of energy conservation and environment protection runs through the Lahori bloodline. Show me any city around where people stand hours in the scorching sun to get CNG over the more pollutant petrol? Show me some place on world which is content with six hours of electricity and mind you do not dare compare it to some undeveloped African village. It is city, damn it, of a million living souls (and even more not-living ones but adding that would be cheating) and totally unique in heavens and earth (notice how hell isn’t included).
As such there are no mountains or hills around but you can see much a greater burden on some of the city’s less fortunate.
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